Bears are one of nature’s greatest trickeries—why make an animal with such adorable fluffy ears, squishy paws, and luxurious fur into an ultimate killing machine? All we want to do is lovingly squeeze them and sleep through the winter together with them in their lair, not to be their lunch. Now that, my friends, is probably one of the most significant injustices in life. And all we can do about it (besides squealing from joy by looking at cute bears in pictures) is to read up on the most adorable bear puns ever. And although this won’t solve nature’s wrongdoing with these painfully cuddly animals, it will at least give you a couple of minutes of mindless chuckling imagining these puns in real life.
So, bears, from tiny ones like koalas to humongous ones like grizzlies and polar bears, are all both scary and irresistibly charming at the same time. The same goes for these clever puns—some will scare you with their wit, while others might stop your heart for a second purely because of their loveliness. Yet puns will never make a lunch out of you; it is much safer to read them than to try to befriend a wild animal, however cute.
So, be prepared for fuzzy tummies, winter constipation, and six-month sleep, as these are all the things that will be discussed in these cute bear puns. And you won’t even have to roam through forests to find them, as they are all just a smidgeon away from your reach! Just scroll down below, check out these funny puns, and, of course, vote for the ones that you’ve enjoyed the most. Also, don’t forget to share this article with anyone who’d love to squeeze a bear!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
What’s a bears favorite shoe? They prefer to go bear foot!
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive? A Furrari.
What would bears be without bees? Ears!
Why do panda bears like going to flea markets? They get the best beargains.
Why do pandas save money printing photos? Most of their pics are black and white.
Why did the boy grizzly bear have a crush on the girl grizzly bear? He thought she was beary pretty!
What do you call a polar bear in Florida? A solar bear.
When the contract was signed between the bears, the claws were not clearly defined.
When I asked the bear about his favorite pop song, he said it is ‘Koala Me Maybe’.
I offered a ride to the bear and asked him where he wanted to go. He replied saying “As fur as possible”.
It was not difficult to guess the bear’s favorite ice-cream flavor. It was strawbeary.
Why was the bear a good fit for the job? He had all the right koalifications!
How do koala bears stop a TV show? They hit the paws button.
What’s a freezing polar bear referred to as? A polar brrrrr.
The bear could not understand what went wrong with his singing. He thought his voice sounded very bearitone.
The bear did not want to step out of the house in the middle of the pandamic.
The bear believes in spirituality and wants to spread pawsitivity.
The bear’s favorite fast food joint served the best bear-gurs.
The bears were racing. The referee said, “Ready, Teddy, Go”.
The teacher refused to teach the class of bears. She said they were bar-bear-ic.
Why did the bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar.
What did the bear say when his friends asked to hang out? “Not today, I need to spend some koalaty time with my family!”
Who’s a bear’s favorite poet? William Shakesbeare!
Why did the bear need to take a break? He just likes to paws and reflect sometimes!
What do you call a bear that never wants to grow up? Peter Panda!
Why was the bear wearing a tank-top? He heard he had the right to bear arms!
What does the husband panda bear tell his wife every night? “I love you beary much!”
What’s a bear’s go-to drink? Coca-koala.
What did the mama grizzly bear tell her kids when they got to the beach? “You have to walk bearfoot.”
What did the grizzly bear say when someone complimented him on his hibernation spot? “Thanks! I built this house with my bear hands.”
What did the boy grizzly bear say to the girl grizzly bear on their wedding day? “I can’t wait to growl old with you.”
What did the bear say when her date showed up too early? I’ll be out in a minute, I’m bearly dressed.
The bear said he loves Spiderman. He also said he loved Peter Pawker in the movie.
The bear fell down and hurt himself. He said the pain was unbearable.
A polar bear was very artistic. He loved drawing self pawtraits.
The first thing the bear told his wife when they got married was, “I will love you furever.”
The bear did not pass his exams. His teacher complained, “There was no koalatative justification in your answer.”
The bear could not enter the concert. He said there were a lot of bearriers.
The plan was cancelled by the bear last minute. His friend said, “I feel beartrayed.”
The brown bear said he does not get sleep anywhere but in his own beardroom.
The group of feminist bears is very vocal. They always fight for ekoalaty.
I went to the bar with my bear friend. He wanted to have a glass of Pina Koala.
It was easy to guess the bear’s favorite food. I knew he would like bearritos.
The bear had severe back pain. The doctor told him it was because of incorrect pawsture.
My brother said he fur-got who Winnie the Pooh was.
The bear was not efficient at work. His colleagues say he was good fur nothing.
Papa Bear had a tough time explaining to his kids what metafurs mean.
The bear got arrested yesterday so he’s meeting his clawyer today.
The best time for bears to have lunch is fur o’clock.
The party saw many fashionable bears. Some of them were wearing suspandas.
The bears were excited to meet their cousins. They had to travel to Bear-lin.
The bear’s family was against her career choices. She wanted to be a bear-tender at a local pub.
Which bear is the most condescending? A pan-duh!
How does Winnie the Pooh call his partner? Hunny.
What did the bear say after looking at his GPS? “Give me a second to get my bearings!”
Why was the little bear so spoiled? Because its mother panda’d to its every need!
What’s a park ranger’s favorite element? Bearium!
How do bears catch fish? They use their bear hands!
What’s a bear’s favorite thing to draw? A self pawtrait!
What’s a bear’s favorite after-school activity? Cub Scouts!
What did the bear say when he fell down the stairs? “Oh, how embearassing!”
You don’t think these bear puns are funny? Bear with me, they get beary funny soon!
Which horror movie is too scary for a bear to watch? The Bear Witch Project!
What did you think of these bear puns? I could bearly stand them!
What’s a teddy bear’s favorite type of pie? Blue-bear-y.
What’s the best way to say sorry to a teddy bear? To bear your heart and soul.
What did the panda pack in her suitcase? The bear necessities.
How do panda bears stay cool in the summer? With lots of bear conditioning.
What did everyone tell the mommy panda about her newborn cub? Your baby is beary, beary cute.
Why did the koala cub forget his lunchbox at home? He was bearly awake this morning and wasn’t thinking straight.
What do you call a polar bear that has a degree in dentistry? A molar bear.
When a grizzly bear got dirt on her fur, what did her best friend say to make her feel better? “Don’t worry! I bearly even see it.”
What’s one thing a grizzly bear can break just by growling? The sound bearier.
What’s a wet bear called? A drizzly bear.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you? I call them bite-mares.
I could hear the bear making faint growls. I was bearly awake.
A boss told a bear that he was koalified for the job.
The zoology teacher said to his students, “Bear in mind the important details.”
When the bears heard a gunshot, there was a pandamonium.
The polar bears were extremely messy. Their mum screamed at them and said: “Did I raise you to be a bar-bear-ian?”.
Baby bear was very ambitious. He always wanted to be a bearrister.
Whenever you see a polar bear in real life, you’ll mostly find them hunting. Polar bears are known for their furry good work ethic.
When one bear married the other, he said: “I love you a sloth.”
The wrestling match between the bears was intense. They both fought tooth and tail.
The hunter thought it was no problem to hunt a bear as it would not make a diffurence.
The famous bear did not get bail. The judge said that the claw and order are the same for every bear.
The bear worked hard for his exams. He stood furst in a class of fifty.
It was his bear-day yesterday. The bear turned two years old.
The Lebanese bears live in the capital of the country. They live in Bear-ut.
The bear could run at a fast speed. He was the flagbearer of his county at the Olympics.
The number of stuffed toys sold in a year went down significantly. There was a steddy decline.
The bears said they love to go for bear-be-ques during the winters.
What did the bear say when he had to relay an unhappy message? “I hate to be the bearer of bad news!”
How do bears prefer to travel? On a bear-o-plane!
Why did the two bears break-up? As much as they tried to make it work, they were just polar opposites!
What did the pessimistic bear say? “It’s just not pawsible!”
What do you call 2020? A panda-emic.
Why did the panda quit his job? He was getting bear minimum wage.
Why did the koala bear want his own place? He couldn’t bear living so close to his family.
Why didn’t the bear get the job at the hair salon? She didn’t have the right koalafications.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow? Bear footed.
What do grizzlies use in the shower? Bear conditioner.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise? Bearobics.
Why did the bear quit his second job? Because he needed some koalaty time with his family.
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig? A teddy boar.
I knew the perfect gift for the baby polar bear. He loves blue-beary cheesecake.
The bear always asks everyone to be positive. He says nothing is impawssible.
When the bear was caught cheating in the game, he was immediately diskoalafied.
The bear family got stuck while on their way to a picnic. They were lots of bearricades on the road.
While doing fieldwork, the bear prefers using a wheelbearrow.
When the bear wore the wrong colored clothing to the party, he called it a faux paw.
The bear wanted a break from work. He applied for furlough.
The bear visited the doctor and got diagnosed with tubearculosis.
He argued with the bear over the food served at the table. He said he begs to diffur.
When bears die, they are bearied.
When I wanted to click a picture, the bears refused to strike a paws.
We got a bear as a pet. Our monthly expandature is very high now.
It was very difficult for the baby bear to lie to his mother. He could never pull off a bearfaced lie.
The party was full of bears who like clicking pictures of themselves. They were all carrying Polaroids.
The bear’s car crashed in the middle of his journey. He had to then call for an Ubear.
The hunter shot down the bear. We felt bad for the bear-eaved family.
He was a daring bear. His friends called him a bear-devil.
What is a bear’s favorite kind of chocolate? Cadbeary Eggs!
What did the bear say when his friend got a bad haircut? “Don’t worry, it’s not furever! Plus, I bearely even notice a difference!”
What did the teddy bear say to motivate his friend? “Nothing is impawsible, if you set your mind to it.”
What’s the secret to a long, happy marriage, according to koalas? You have to love spending koalaty time together with your spouse.
What did one koala say to the other? “Stop it! You’re being unbearable.”
What type of cereal does the polar bear always have for breakfast? Ice Krispies.
Why did the bear quit his job at the daycare center? It was panda-monium.
Baby bear wished Papa Bear Father’s Day. He said, “You are the beary best.”
The bear told his enemy, “I’ll fight you with my bear hands.”
The polar bear had to tell his mother about the accident. He said he hates to be the bear-er of bad news.
If you ever get a pet bear, make sure you put a koalar around his neck.
When the bear was ordering his birthday cake, he said he wanted a lot of bearies on it.
The bear could not catch up with his friend who walked really fast. He complained his friend was beary slow.
I asked the bear his favorite movie. He said he loves ‘The Expandables.’
The bear did not have any fur. He was bare.
The spoiled baby bear said he wants a chau-fur to drive him around.
The bear was not given the job because he was underkoalafied.
The bear said she wanted to move out. She wanted to be indepandant.
The bear was waiting for his friend to join him. He had pawsed the movie.
When I invited the bear to my birthday party, he said he needs to check his koalendar.
The bear moved from one city to the other. He called his life ‘A Tail of Two Cities’.
The bear filed for bankruptcy when his business did not work. He didn’t feel paw-sitive.